Earlier today I sent the post about what it's like to like someone at 39 and I was respectively turned down by that exact individual. I kindly responded with a polite gesture and thanked him for being openminded and not quickly to judge, yet standing his ground for himself.
It didn't really hurt, it was more relieving to know that he's not that into me and that he's on another path than I. It actually lead me to realize that I'm only making a larger list of what I'm yearning and looking for in a man, than to sit in misery and wonder why this or why not that. It helped me to remember some GREAT memories with those that I loved previously. It helped me to remember the times I was held and how profoundly amazing it felt to be in someone's arms that really cared for me. It helped me to remember other's gestures of love and what I really enjoyed in my life, thus far. Since there have been some glimpses of HOPE and LOVE, I really do not want to forget them.
Do I regret taking the risks I've taken to love? Absolutely NOT!!! Why you ask, would I put myself on the line and become so vulnerable to know that rejection is literally right around the corner. Well, it's simple really, I'll never know if that ONE person will be there if I don't share who I really am. I'm a very intense, high energy, complex, loving, caring, kind hearted, generous and courageous woman who will move mountains for those she loves, as well as go on adventures, take risks and do pretty much what most humans won't to see what's on the other side. I'm a great person who knows herself and also loves herself enough to know that she makes multiple mistakes and is still learning how to live this journey called life. I've got a long ways to go, but one thing I won't do is REGRET!! EVER!!!
It didn't really hurt, it was more relieving to know that he's not that into me and that he's on another path than I. It actually lead me to realize that I'm only making a larger list of what I'm yearning and looking for in a man, than to sit in misery and wonder why this or why not that. It helped me to remember some GREAT memories with those that I loved previously. It helped me to remember the times I was held and how profoundly amazing it felt to be in someone's arms that really cared for me. It helped me to remember other's gestures of love and what I really enjoyed in my life, thus far. Since there have been some glimpses of HOPE and LOVE, I really do not want to forget them.
Do I regret taking the risks I've taken to love? Absolutely NOT!!! Why you ask, would I put myself on the line and become so vulnerable to know that rejection is literally right around the corner. Well, it's simple really, I'll never know if that ONE person will be there if I don't share who I really am. I'm a very intense, high energy, complex, loving, caring, kind hearted, generous and courageous woman who will move mountains for those she loves, as well as go on adventures, take risks and do pretty much what most humans won't to see what's on the other side. I'm a great person who knows herself and also loves herself enough to know that she makes multiple mistakes and is still learning how to live this journey called life. I've got a long ways to go, but one thing I won't do is REGRET!! EVER!!!
I know that in my heart, that I deserve the world and that I deserve to happy, joyous and free. I know that God will take care of me and I also know that even though as much as I want it to be MY time now, it's not. It's not time for me to settle down with an individual yet, for God's prepping the right one. HE needs alot of work ya know, because I'm a blasted handful and if we're ever going to make it through eternity, He's going to need tools most men don't have.
Tonight, I've sent out multiple messages to those that had my heart at one time or another to let them know that I'm happy that they were able to receive the love that they deserved. I'm able to reach out to each and everyone of them and wish them the best. I'm able to know that they were not meant for me, but were put in my path to help me realize that there's good men out there still and that when the one shows up in my life, I'll know how to piece it all together and make it work at that time.
I'm not a very patient girl, however, I'm a faithful one that believes in God and God's timing is what's important, not mine. All I need to do with my time is to make sure that I'm living in this moment and to enjoy it, for it will be gone in the next. All we have is the NOW and the NOW is what we need to make the best of the best!!!
So, here's to waiting longer... Staying openminded and willing and also honest to myself as the path forward is nothing but greatness with some growth.
Tonight, I've sent out multiple messages to those that had my heart at one time or another to let them know that I'm happy that they were able to receive the love that they deserved. I'm able to reach out to each and everyone of them and wish them the best. I'm able to know that they were not meant for me, but were put in my path to help me realize that there's good men out there still and that when the one shows up in my life, I'll know how to piece it all together and make it work at that time.
I'm not a very patient girl, however, I'm a faithful one that believes in God and God's timing is what's important, not mine. All I need to do with my time is to make sure that I'm living in this moment and to enjoy it, for it will be gone in the next. All we have is the NOW and the NOW is what we need to make the best of the best!!!
So, here's to waiting longer... Staying openminded and willing and also honest to myself as the path forward is nothing but greatness with some growth.
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